by Monique Bartley
You mean I have to print it on real paper then walk to your office to turn it? You know about the internet right?
I know you know that I don’t know the answer!
I think you misspoke, sir.
I think it’s cute that you think I’m not going to use it anyway.
Hangovers and “I just don’t feel like it” are totally legitimate excuses.
I skipped getting a breakfast sandwich to be here on time, OK? Have some respect.
“So if it has a screen, beeps, or is otherwise more entertaining than my lecture it better not be turned on.”
I’ll study for this math test by counting all the margaritas I’ll be drinking at the swim-up bar.
Not that you’d actually do it early, you just want them to respect the idea of you being organized.
Weekends are reserved for no pants and movies in bed. Why is that so hard to understand?
Cool. Not like I have any other classes to prepare for.
You’re joking, right?
Bullshit, Madame! You’ve hated me since the day I failed that irregular verb quiz.